Thank you for even that attitude alone. I’d considered going back to owning a firearm th4oughout all of this, but lack the living situation to legally buy one rn, or to feel right and capable keeping it secure.

I think its a FB group, which I only just now have started trying to use again, so I can’t say I know much about them.

I’ll ask my partner if I’m right and get a link for you.

Note about the police:

This should really be taken with the understanding that I am a white (trans)woman, who is sober, quiet, who is well practiced in the masking needed to make these types of interactions survivable. I am acutely aware that I am very privileged to have not been treated in the way POC’s have and still are. I feel like POC’s are likely to be safe in MN, but I’m not qualified to really speak anything beyond that.

In total, I would guess I have had ~20-25 interactions with police over the last 1.5years. All but 2 of them were almost identical: Sleeping while parked legally overnight, and lasting all of 3 mins to knock on my covered window, do a quick ID check, and make sure im not drunk / OD’d

The other 2 were fortunately just as uneventful.

Stay safe out there, no matter where you come from, and remember to stick together when you can. 💜

I’ve posted a fair handful of comments about the details leading to my current situation, as well as plenty of details about life since, on various posts elsewhere on lemmy. I’m going to avoid wasting time that I already spent writting what was a better comment than I have the energy to do rn. If you have a question, i’ll be sure to respond, and especially quick to other transpeople who have questions and are considering seeking safety here.

Also, feel free to DM me if you have concerns you’d prefer to not have in comments.

Stay safe out there, you’re worth it!

We all gotta examine our choices from time to time an make sure we are ok with what we considered when made them.

Otherwise we’re likely to end up close minded and arrogant / cocksure and self-righteous.

I’ve had some time to step away, but I do want to address a certain aspect of your comment.

Setting aside your egregious assumptions about irrelevant discussion, your response reads to me 1 of 2 ways:

1. You are not very practiced in regular every day communication, and did not understand the discussion and its nuanced and specific nature. And you just jumped the shark, and skipped right on to debating(why?) the general themes of being a multi property company/landlord.

2. Or you felt the need to toss around your own life’s experience as both relevant (it wasn’t) or morally superior to a total stranger’s. If you need that, then you have my blessing to see it that way, doesn’t bother me.

Now, bringing back the assumptions that are so fucking telling of your privilege in life.

-My family member has never been a landlord and owns 1 home.

-I’m unhoused because I had the misfortune of coming out as trans to my disabled family member I had been helping take care of for 5 years and had been living with, and in the same week was let go along with 95% of the company because of a buyout. The lack of stability I’d counted on to push through the initial problems I knew would happen meant I had to still move out just without any income.

-my financial literacy is far below where I wish it were, but considering that I got to start out adulthood with my credit score already having been wrecked by my abusive guardians I barely made it away from, I’m doing pretty fucking well considering.

You need to read more, and keep your thoughts internal until you get used to speaking to people in real life. If this thread was a conversation in real life, everyone would have already walked off. JFC

This comment reads like a person who keeps being pulled into previous lives, and started hallucinating they were some monkish writer.

Are you ok?

Yup!

And what isn’t an illegal act =/= what isn’t morally justified action.

I wake up each day already doing crime in certain countries.

Be Gay.

Do Crime.

Lots of crime! (ง ื▿ ื)ว

Thank you.

All of this sucks to think about after remembering what all is involved whenever this happens. As much as I need help in life right now, I want as much time as possible between now and then… I have nobody else left, my mom just passed unexpectedly in March, except for the aunt and uncle who abused me for 20 years who have been dead to me for almost 8 years now, and a highly estranged dad.

I’ve met others who are im even rougher shape than me, so I know things aren’t as worse as they could be, so I’d rather have time shared than whatever is to come after our time runs out… anyways, thanks for being so nice. This is all so hard

First and foremost though, physician heal thyself.

I try. Oh Lord do I try. Every time I try to be kind to myself, its with the job of overcoming the years of reinforced guilt. Its my biggest hurddle in life. At least I’m able to choose kindness towards others day in and day out… thats gotta mean something 😅🥲

Unfortunately I don’t think that there is any real ability for it to happen without her estate liquidation. Her home is lovely nice and in great shape and her many high-value belongings are in great shape too but they have to be sold I think I can’t really even stand asking a single question about all this but I certainly don’t feel as though I’m being cheated.

Especially considering my current situation is partially due to tha fallout from something I thought would never result in an inheritance much less a positive relationship (my having come out as trans 2 years ago while living and helping my mom care for her for 5 years while healing from some really intense trauma and the threat of more that was my prior renting situation… Aaaand being let go the same week due to company buyout just led to having to move out without somewhere to go) so anything I am getting is unexpected and icing on the cake that is having any relationship at all with my last remaining family member.

Oh and take a look at some of the other replies I’ve made as to my thoughts on the rest of your comment, sorry I just don’t feel like typing it out anymore. I have led a pretty rough life that still isn’t out of the weeds yet, and it wears down on a girl to reshare sometimes.

Thanks.

Yeah, no market rate / ai / industry standards at all. I already know I couldn’t live life attempting to justify receiving rent payments that are more than the honest value I’d provided.

I’ve rented from a place that couldn’t even be bothered to provide what was initally promised at the already needlessly bloated price, and fortunately I was immediately able to stand and fight for them to withdraw from their end of the lease and got mo§t of my money back.

I’ve (sub)rented from a friend who took what was left of my nice things (after rapidly selling off so damned much of my few stuff) and all of their stuff, my rent payment, and the additional money I’d pulled together to help them with the panicked rental situation they had presented… and just leave with all of it and move to another state without even paying the landlord.

I’ve rented a room from what looked like an average "middle"class divorcee with a job that supposedly kept them in another state 2 weeks each month, but turned out to be a nightmare of a situation involving him moving in his fellow skinhead neonazi methhead and eventually had the cold barrel of a revolver being pressed against my head to force me to do some terrible stuff, including some stuff thats super duper not legal (and yet somehow was able to at least do what I was being told to do without causing harm to anyone except myself and government)

And I have even had to move back in with the incredibly abusive family that was supposed to raise me to “try and save up” for my own place, only to loose any ability to heal and grow enough to even see the point of trying to find my own way in life.

If it is as possible to remain ethical receiving rent payments from another human being, then only the fucking most honest of price and value would already be the only way forward. I can’t imagine being in such a position to perpetuate anything

*she

And if I went through with this, I certainly won’t be using some standardized pricing. It would be soley based on the my time spent (at the lowest reasonable rate for the area) and expenses associated with owning and upkeep + cost of only the upgrades that the tenants area receive, not the stuff done to spaces that aren’t part of the renter’s access.

I don’t see this as a way to make a profit. I just see this as the stuff that would be part of, what is the only likely opportunity to own a home that I’ll ever have. And after some of the comments so far, I guess I also see this as an opportunity to make someone’s renting experience to be way more than even the best of values they could ever find… certainly more than I’ve had.

This shit gives me real, lasting panic, so I actually want other peoples ethical discussion. I’ve reached the limits of my current strength, but don’t want to be caught with pants down should they pass soon.